From Family Man to Salesman & Back

There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends. ~Homer

I never thought I’d overcome my failures.  I never thought I could make it all “work”, as they say.  My wife and I were married when we were 18… yes, 18 and no, it wasn’t because she was pregnant.  We were in love, well that’s what we thought it was at the time.  Now, we more readily identify it as lust.  It took us about seven years of disdain and staying together simply because we want to prove our parents wrong to get it right.  About 8 years ago, we figured it out through a variety of hardships.  We walked through fire, hand in hand and came out best friends and fused together on the other side.  Amazingly enough when I put my life in priority and not be the over-achieving work-aholic that I had become, it all worked out.  That story can be found elsewhere…

What the heck does this have to do with Real Estate???  Everything….  I’ve never been one prone to motivational speakers or holistic lifestyle programs.  But, I do subscribe to the fact that a balanced personal life will influence your career, as much (if not more) that a miserable personal life.  My family has been an important element to my Real Estate career and an inspiration for each time I had to deal with one more difficult person.  My focus has been based deeply in my belief system and in family.  It’s given me balance and made me a better person.  

Too often practitioners become so overly concerned with the awards, the accolades, the status that they fail to see that the one true purpose in life is to leave a legacy.  Let me ask you, when you are retiring from this career will your children remember all the plaques and awards, the nice cars and the endless banquets that they had a babysitter for?  If so, what benefit that they receive?  Would it be more influential that you were a solid parent to them?  Did you pass on your ability to balance life and appreciate people?  When my three beautiful daughters grow and mature, I want to know that I had a part in their capabilities and compassions.  I don’t want to relegate that to my wife in order to provide comforts.  The trade-off isn’t worth it.  I know…I’ve tried…I’ve failed.

Balance in life is organizing your lifestyle to ensure that all needs are met.  I LOVE the social media aspects of the RE.net and deeply appreciate the friends that I’ve made there, but tomorrow when I fail (as we all do, from time to time) who am I going to turn to?  Will I have made enough deposits of relational value to my family, to cover me in my time of need?  I pray that I have. 

I try very hard for my life to be family centered and what I have found is that emphasis on relationship, has prepared me better to interact with my clients.  This priority based lifestyle, has helped me put my clients needs in perspective.  We fail in this field so often, because we listen but don’t really hear what our clients are telling us.  We treat them as spreadsheets at times or some agents see them as a commission check in the end.  There are many opportunities to stop and ask yourself if you were in your client’s shoes, what would you do? 

I want to end this post with a challenge for all the readers.  Stop.  Ask.  Reflect.  Take Action.    Stop what you’re doing right now…  Ask, is my family benefiting from my business practice (not just financially, but more importantly emotionally).  Reflect on your answers and then take action to revisit your business activities to ensure you have the proper priorities….